Your Phone, Ringing It Is
Yes, I know you have the newest most terribly expensive phone. Yes, I know that your terribly fashionable ringtone is the latest song by the coolest artist. Yes, I know that someone terribly important is trying desperately to get a hold of you to make a life altering decision for them. Yes, your phone, ringing it is, answer you must.
And then by all means, take your eyes off the road and one hand off your steering wheel to fumble in your pocket/handbag for that wailing piece of technology;
and and and…
with your eyes still off the road you proceed remove your other hand off the steering wheel (replacing it with your knees) to gab and gesticulate pointedly, even though the person on the other end of the line can’t see you!
Brilliant I say. That’s like, blind driving and multitasking at its zenith.
NOT!
Oh and believe me this doesn’t only apply to people who drive. Even the wheel-less are not exempt from blind road crossings.
Why the rant today? Because I almost ran over this idiot who was, get this; not driving but WALKING across the road while gabbing on his phone – completely OBLIVIOUS to the moving vehicle aiming straight for him!
C’mon, that was so totally not my fault. I know I have road rage everytime I get behind the wheel of my car but seriously, I was driving at 8kmph because I was looking for a parking spot and this phone talking moron just saunters across the street. I mean, he didn’t even NOTICE I was less than a metre away!
So… I hit the horn. And I almost pissed in my pants laughing when the idiot almost did a backflip from the shock when he realised that he was 2 seconds away from being roadkill.
Seriously though, did you know that risk of motor vehicles crashes QUARDRUPLES (means x4) when driving while talking on the phone – and injuries are usually serious enough to warrant hospitalisation? And that 89% of these crashes involve additional vehicles? And that 75% of all phone related crashes happened in clear weather conditions?
People, the ban on phones while driving are there for a reason. I know our respective governments can be quite ridiculous most of the time but I wholeheartedly agree with the laws against driving & phoning. And after today I’m all for banning people from WALKING & phoning.
Think about it, how many times have you needed to overtake/avoid a swerving car only to find out when you pass that the erratic and reckless driving was because the driver was on the phone? Or the morons who walk in the middle of the road shooting off their traps into the phones that have seemingly melded to their arms; unaware of their surroundings and oncoming vehicles? Or even MORE better; the motorcyclists with their phones jammed up their unbuckled helmets as a makeshift hands free kit?
Don’t even get me started about the irritating asshats who answer their phones at the theatre or in the middle of a date; and (not a personal experience) people who answer their phones in the middle of sex. Like hello? Is nothing sacred anymore?
Sigh. Into each life a few phones must ring. And speaking of which, excuse me, I’ll get it!